Sun and Shadows, or Time Ticks On
Acrylic on paper, moleskine 5.5"x8"
A painting! It's been ages since I painted. But one day after my new job, while one child was still napping and the sun was deep in the sky, I had the uncontrollable urge to paint. I hauled my traveling studio out to the deck and started painting.
This isn't a true life depiction of what I saw, not really. It's more the impression of the backyard, sun and shadows. The deep kind that oak trees and heavy pine trees make. It's an experiment, because I haven't often achieved the look I want in strong sun.
But look. When I took my photo, I held the book up against the back yard (which I wasn't in when I was painting) and it kinda looks like it. Not entirely, I still would like some more lightness in the trees, but hey, this painting is about shadows, not trees, so it's not really that important.
But, like my little girl asked me, "what are those?" pointing at the hatches I've marked anywhere there is light.
What are they?
First off, the texture intrigues me. And my obsessive need to do something with my hands is appeased as I tick off little lines with my paintbrush. And then again, to me, those hatches show the passage of time. Little bit by little bit, reminding me to love what I have right now, while I have it. Plus, I'm a little bit enamored of her.
Because Summer ends. And I will move. And the kids will grow up. And I will go on to do other things. But right now is right now. And that's okay. Right now has it's beauties. So does later. But if I'm longing for the beauties of later, I will miss the beauties of right now. And vice versa.
Sometimes painting reminds me of the present. Sometimes it takes me back into the past. No it always does. I can look at a painting I did 20 years ago and remember the place, the time, the landscape, who I was at that time, who I loved, my worries. No matter how realistic or abstract the painting is, that painting holds time still, on paper. It holds that moment of me, and marks it down.