Flying Girl Blessings, or Imperfection (in progress)
cotton, fiberfill, thread.
I couldn't get online all day today and only have fifteen minutes to post before I have to do the bedtime routine, and I thought this would be the perfect time to post my meditation on imperfection. And this would be the perfect piece to illustrate it.
So, I had the brilliant idea to do soft sculpture Flying Girls, and the top girl here was my first attempt. I crashed and burned. The fabric burst and I couldn't get the little pieces stuffed and didn't know how to handle the leg that I left unsewn for turning and filling.
I moved on to the felt and had more success and enjoyed putting together new flying girls in 3d (more to come in the near future). Then I came back and tried again, since I'd cut two girls out of the fabric, before I'd tried to sew it and discovered it wouldn't work.
It didn't work again.
Or did it?
I'm thinking there's something here in the Flying Girls abject failure. I'm thinking I like the broken feel to them, the wonkiness, the mess. I'm thinking something profound may come from Imperfection. Or not. They may remain failures.
The truth is, I need to stop waiting for things to be perfect before I go forward. I need to stop waiting for the perfect timing and total mastery and not a stitch out of place.
All the time I am waiting to be perfect, I am not living, I am not getting out there, I am not creating, I am not making dreams happen. I know this, because I've spent much of the last 18 years trying to perfect all sorts of things about me, rather than just diving in.
Dreams don't happen because we are perfect. They happen because we put ourselves out there, we are willing to show our work, willing to stumble, willing to be hurt.
Willing to fail.
Failure is the most important thing I am learning about.
Failure is how we succeed.
The mess of life is actually living.
It's not about living in a perfect home and pristine surroundings, it is about getting things dirty and saying, hell yes.
There is not perfect time to finally be happy, to finally have the life that you've been longing for. There is only now.
Now in it's imperfection, is perfect and true.
You in your imperfection, did you know you were perfect, too?