Thursday, September 23, 2010

Fear and Mushrooms in Michigan

It has been suggested that I should share my writing on my blog. By which I assume they mean my fiction writing.

To that, I say....

Here's a picture of some mushrooms we found on our walk to school. See the school bus in the background? I timed that shot. But don't worry, it wasn't our bus. This was on the way back after we dropped G off at his school bus. We spotted the mushrooms on the way there, but being a responsible mom, I made sure to send the boy off to school on time before doing a photo shoot.
Oh. Okay. That's not fiction writing.

It's very hard for me to share my fiction writing. I have a couple of novels stuffed in a trunk in a different state that no one has ever read. Well.... one person has read one.

But I have been working on my novel. Work work work. Even while I am at work, if it is slow, I am working. Look what I did on Tuesday.... I sketched out a 6 Week Goal Planner. It's pretty tiny, so that it can fit in my little folder. Actually, it's probably more like a writing log, so I can see my progress.

If you look, I've planned out a goal to revise 100 pages a week. So I should be done revising in TWO weeks. Yipes. I am not sure this goal is possible. I've been assuming that I will only be able to work 5 days a week, with all my other responsibilities, so that means 20 pages a day. I have not been averaging 20 pages a day so far. But then, it is revising, and revising is not as neat and tidy as just simply writing new prose. I could zoom through 60 pages one day, and then go back and do close work and only get 2 pages done. Oh, greadness goocious, I have no idea how far along I will be able to get.

It's a good thing I keep a log. It helps to be able to see my progress, especially on a larger project like a novel, because otherwise I feel like I am not getting anywhere. So I keep a log of what I have done, and then I can see the numbers slowly rising. I have another log that I keep on a file on my computer that is more detailed. But I like also being able to carry the planning around with me, so that I can remind myself of my work as the day is going on.

Because you know, when you write a novel, you really have to live in that novel. It has to be living with you.
And here is what my novel looks like. Or at least the first third of it.

I am afraid to look through it in hard copy.

Afraid I say.

And you know what that means?

That means I have to do it.

You've got to face up to the things you are afraid of, because those are the things that matter most to you.

Think about it. Those things that you have been avoiding, are you really avoiding them because you don't have time or because other things are more important, or are you avoiding them because they scare the bejeebers out of you? Be honest with yourself. If the first, then maybe you can let them go, but if it's the second, then you have to face the fears and do it anyway, or the person you will disappoint is YOU.

Oh no.

I think that means I have to share my fiction writing, too.

Curses.

5 comments:

Jackie said...

Well, I am afraid for the whole world to see me naked, but I am not going to post it anytime soon ,lol. I am sure sharing your writing before its time would be kinda like that ;) I love just hearing about your process , no matter if it's art or writing .It has encouraged me many times to keep pushing through my fear .I love this very sentence :
You've got to face up to the things you are afraid of, because those are the things that matter most to you.
I think I will post it where I can see it . Thank you .

JES said...

I told you back during the "Burning Lines" exercise, after one of your strikingly off-the-wall contributions, that I wanted to be first in line for a copy of your first book. From the look of that planner, maybe my opportunity approaches!

I couldn't tell from the photo what media you used to create the planner, i.e., whether it can be readily modified. Assuming it's not too hard, you might want to give yourself the option of adjusting the schedule based on your growing experience of how much you can actually accomplish, on average, on a given day.

(And, hmm, now that I'm thinking about it... Suppose the 6-week planner actually consisted of 6 separate cards which could be hooked or threaded together, bottom of one card to the top of the next... Then as you finished one week, you could bump that card to the bottom of the string, changing the dates/goals to represent the new week #6. Does that make sense???)

As for whether to post your fiction online... No easy answer, I think. I do it, but I also fret over the practice more or less non-stop. The most recent bit I posted, I stuck on a password-protected page. Maybe that's the way to go.

Three Owls said...

ok... fine. I'll get back to work right after this comment...

and yes I am afraid... afraid to be that organized and responsible person that I actually am... afraid to raise expectations and then be disappointing... afraid to move into a different lifestyle and stay grounded... afraid to put my own needs ahead of my children's and potentially fail as a parent...

and all this over dresses... lol.

Thanks for the fresh perspective :)

Stella said...

Love this. All of it. Yes!!

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