Cherry Tree at Night Pin
Wool Felt and Acrylic Felt, thread, embroidery floss, pin backing
I have fewer epiphanies today. I'm kind of tired. I've been busy making stuff and planning stuff and taking care of kids and working.
I'm glad I didn't use this photo back when I showed you the other cherry tree pin, because I need it now. I have no photos ready of the stuff I'm working on. Plus, nothing new is done. I guess that's what happens when you are always working on stuff.
One of my coworkers asked me (after checking out my handy dandy felt bill fold that I use to hold my checks and change while waiting tables) when I get the chance to make all this stuff. I told her I work while I am watching the kids, or at night when I get home, relaxing in front of the tv.
I realized then that I always have to have something to do with my hands. I feel weird if my hands are not active. I used to doodle while taking notes in school. I'd write in my journal while having coffee. I remember when I was a kid, I'd have a tiny pair of scissors and a tiny piece of paper and I'd cut out silhouettes of tiny little animals in math class. I don't know why I did that in math class, but I did. Sometimes it's just playing spider solitaire on my laptop.
Lately, I've taken to shredding an old tshirt to turn it into a Spring scarf. I sit there picking at the knit with a seam ripper. It takes a really long time, but I like the physical act of taking it apart. It's like the reverse of sewing the tiny stitches in my pins or little animals or whatever.
I realize also, there is something satisfying about deconstructing-- taking something apart to make something new and better out of it.
Now, maybe in the act of deconstructing you end up making a huge mess, a confusing jumble of bits and parts, discards and mistakes and loose threads, but as you clear out what is no longer needed, you start to see the shape of what you have coming... and it starts to make sense.
This is not just my tshirt/scarf I'm talking about. This is the process of living... of change, growth, transformation.
In order to have it all make sense, sometimes you have to get confused and make that mess.
Just make it.
That mess is what you need.