It's a Question of Art... or Maybe it's a Question of Blogging

Girl Who Is Worth It, Girl of the Silver Seas, Girl of the Dawn
4/09
Three ACEOS, mixed media acrylic paintings on 140lb watercolor paper, 2.5"x3.5"

Lately, I have been thinking about what purpose art serves in my life.

I mean, I paint a lot, as you have seen. But the question remains, why am I doing it?

Art for me has always been an outlet. Feelings, thoughts, experiences, meaning, understanding. It's been a way to pass the time when there was nothing else to do. It's been a way to document where I have been and what I have seen. It's also been a tactile pleasure, the colors, the feel of pen or pencil or brush on paper. It's also been a thrill. It's just fun to make something out of nothing, to create something pretty or strong. (as a side note, I have also used writing to do all these things.)

Art has never been linked to commerce for me before. Now I have my shop, and I feel like I am painting things just for the shop. Well not quite, but in a way, I feel that the shop legitimizes something that was just "fun."

It's messing with my head a bit. Now that it's "work" I've drained a lot of the "fun" out of it... but it's not that the experience is different, just my reading of it. I think because if it isn't "fun", then it must be "work", and if it's "work" then it must be "worth it". Here lies the strange logic of my value system-- the same one that has always said my art/I wasn't worth monetary remuneration.

Hey, I know it's screwy. I'm working on changing my attitudes towards self worth and money and abundance. It's the time for it, what with the recession and underemployment and SAHMing. I think I will come out of the other side of these trouble with a new world view, a new self view and a lot more abundance. If I keep working on it. Which I guess I am... in part with my painting. Hello Flying Girl on her Journey. Hello Goddess Girls and their spirits being drawn into the world. (What's her name, "Girl Who is Worth It?")

This comes back to my art again. What is it? To tell you the truth, if I were serious about entering the art world-- you know, "The Art World" with gallery representation and critical acclaim, I think I would be painting something different. Landscapes or abstracts or portraits, and probably much larger and canvas. I think I wouldn't have my girls on their journeys. These are stories. These are spirituality. These are lessons. I'm not really going in the traditional art world direction.

Is it a bad idea for me to put out there what my art means to me, and hopefully what it means to my life? I mean, I wouldn't mind gallery representation if it happened, but right now, my art is ABOUT the lesson. It's about creativity and wholeness and how everyone can use art to find themselves and move forward in their path.

In a way, while I love my paintings, what I am doing is not really "about" the product. It is about the process. The process of creating me. The process of exploring the creative journey. Ultimately, I know that I want to be even more explicit and write a book about creativity and transformation, for everyone.

You see, another important part of my creativity right now is actually you.

If it were all about me, I probably wouldn't still be painting with the frequency that I am. When I paint, I think about you-- my readers, my friends. I think about the meaning, not only to me, but what it all can mean to you.

So here's my question for you:
What would you like in these posts? How can I help or inspire you in your own creativity and understanding? Do you want more Flying Girls and analysis? Do you want to hear about the physical process of creation, how the paint goes down, how decisions are made about what to paint? Do you want discussions of how to further your own creativity? Breaking through blocks and developing your voice? Do you want exercises or prompts? I am a teacher and I love to do it, so this is no problem for me. Or are we talking empowerment here? Do we want discussions about what it means to be human, a woman, a mom, an artist, a child? Do you want more personal stories? Do you want to hear mommyblogger stuff? More kid activities? Should I be taking more photos of my life with my little point and shoot? More art, less talk? More talk less art? Contests? Giveaways? Interviews with other artists/writers/bloggers?

Whatever you are interested in. I'd like to hear. Even if I didn't mention it, give me a shout and tell me. Leave a comment or email me or twitter me or, hey! even join my Facebook fan page... which is still in development. I can't believe I have a "fan" page, but hey, it's the biz.